Just Walking

I went walking today and these are pictures I took on my walk. I felt so thankful for the color God gave me. So thankful for eyes. So thankful for the weather being cool enough to go walking. It is moments like today, that I remember how marvelous is our God!

I Can Tend My Own Garden

I just finished a documentary of children raised in prostitution in India. The children are trapped and really have little ways out of simply doing what their parents do. Mothers push young girl into the trade and so it goes.

I feel ashamed, angry, depressed and hopeless as I think of the situation. What can I do? It seems I am so far away, and clueless on my part. But hopelessness accomplishes nothing.

Jesus was a man of hope. He did not stop service because he could not travel around the world. He served where he was and his message went around the world.

I can do that kind of service. I can serve here; and do my best. When I serve here it touches many others and God is responsible for leading us. I am willing, and waiting to see where God leads. I may not save a child in India, but there are many children here. My duty is my own "garden". As I tend the duties God places before me, then he will broaden my mission. Changing the world for me means doing service where God has planted me.

Being the hands, heart and minister of God's will for mankind: compassion, boldness and passion for all his children no matter what part of the world they may live in.

Today we had a lightening storm. Here that is a big event because we have them about twice a year. It was small but my neighbors and I went out to watch the dark clouds and we both enjoyed the show. As I was watching I was thinking. What will it be when Jesus returns? Will some be excited while others run in fear?

God knows that answer, I just want to be ready.

1 Th. 4:17 Then we which are alive [and] remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord.

Hope You Enjoy

When I visited our daughter we went on a walk. These are pictures from that walk and from a near by park. Isn't the gift of sight wonderful? And what a marvelous God to give us so many lovely things to look at... I hope you enjoy these pictures.

The Lesson

I was pretty disgusted with myself yesterday. I had a whole day to do whatever I wanted to do...and I wasted it. I did chores, but I did not do them quickly and I found many reasons not to finish my painting which was really what needed to be done.

So at the end of the day I was pouting, angry and wanting to just feel sorry for myself. Yesterday was a good lesson to me. Get things straight, do what you need to do: and be happy. Fool around, short cut responsibilities pay a price.

What about my faith journey? Doesn't it work that way too? When I seek God, joy. When I seek self: selfishness, pain.

I love being a Christian. My choice to follow Jesus blesses my life. But if I want that relationship to grow, I need to invest in time with God.

My Dogs

I admit it. I love my dogs. Recently I had to put my dog on the top to sleep. I thought I would totally fall apart. He had been my all time favorite.

I did cry, but surprisingly I really was not as sad as I thought I would be.

Shortly afterwards I adopted my Jade.

As I thought about why I did not totally fall apart. I realized it had to be God.

I loved that little Banny so much I could not hardly stand it. But in mercy God somehow covered me from much pain.

I am truly thankful for the little things God does. Keeping me from falling apart simply was a God thing. Blessing to my dear gone lost friend. But little Jade is making her way into my heart now. As we adjust to life together I am simply amazed at the wonderful things God puts in our lives.

A Powerful Woman

This is a woman of power. Recently my friend visited me for a week. She has an incredible story of faith. Raised Catholic she was a nun for thirty years until she felt God led her another direction.

But she never stopped ministry. Today at 76 she still works counseling and sharing her powerful love of God and faith. She told me she never worries about death. She looks forward to the time she can rest in Jesus, but shares the joy of life now as well.

Isn't that a powerful testimony. Joy now and joy later!

A Tale of Two Churches

Recently my church decided to stop actively pursing buying a church. One reason is because we wanted more time for ministry.

When I was a child my church family decided to build a church. Each week we heard from the pulpit fund raising, expectations and updates on getting closer. But we never heard to stop what we were doing for the purpose of ministry.

I don't condemn my church of my childhood. Those people loved God and were doing what they knew how to do...work. But today I am glad to belong to a church that finds ministry as the most important avenue to pursue. I would much rather hear about out reach than how many dollars we still need.

It is not that we have given up our dream. We will still pursue purchase, but at a slow pace so that our first priority is service to God. I am humbled to belong to a church that chooses to NOT move forward on purchase so that we can be free to serve God's broken hearted.

Emotionally Disabled

I was reading a bit in a book and basically it said to realize some people can not help their behavior. They are emotionally disabled.

The paragraph really stuck out to me. The reason is because I have two people in my life which that so describes. We adopted a child, and his background is from drugs. He looks normal but does not think normal....enter his ex girl friend. They have a child so I see her often. She thinks as poorly as he does. Sometimes I get so frustrated with her that I want to scream. It is hard for me to live my faith with both of them at times. They make horrid choices, and unfortunately I really don't believe they are able to do better. They look normal and can talk normal but their behaviors are extreme and both share back grounds of drug using parents.

When I am in a good mood it is so much easier to be patient with them. They are teaching me though. Often I have to step out of my own feelings and work solely on the knowledge that though they are driving me crazy; they are doing their best.

Judge not, the bible says. Christian faith should work on principle, not feeling. When I am tempted to judge others around me, I need to remember that is not my job. My job is to be kind, loving and live like Jesus. Even when I don't feel like it.

A Bad Day

I was getting ready to leave church when a young woman came up to me and gave me a big hug, "You know I just had to give you a hug to say thank you."

I smiled a weak smile and said something kind but jogged off into my own world of clutter and frustration. My day had been one I was not feeling very "Christian". Tired, angry and irritated I had pushed myself to "do the right thing".

Just now I realized that what happened today was that God used my frustration to help this young woman. As I tried to minister to her, I shared that I was also having a "bad day". She was touched to see someone be honest about frustrations with attitude and faith. It was my honesty that touched her heart.

Christian's often make mistakes, I think, when we are not honest. Must we always go with smiling faces and deny that we have bad days? I certainly do not think we should carry frowns as our general look. But, when is it time to be honest and say, "Yeah, I get it. I am having a hard day too."? Sometimes just sharing the truth is more healing than trite phrases, "Oh pray about it..."

In general I believe Christian's should be cheerful and full of hope. But I do not believe that Christians should be fake. We need to be gentle, kind and honest.

God is in Control

Today I am feeling so angry and frustrated. I did not care for church. I feel used by someone, and I am worried about a family member. Given my general attitude I am a big cry baby today. I have prayed to God to give me peace and joy; though I really don't feel any.

Is God not listening? Well, yes I think He is.

The blessing today, is that I know this day will pass. That he answered my prayer not fighting with someone which is pushing my buttons. That he helped me be respectful when I felt hateful.

A true Christian, does not have to feel good to do right. So though I don't feel God right now, I certainly know he has helped me. Because despite my negative feelings for today: I stayed in control.

There will be other days when things go perfectly. Today I can just trust that God is in control and has helped my live my faith.

Good Morning World!

Well, the day is up and going great. How nice it is to feel fresh and happy! This is the day the Lord has made- let us rejoice and be glad in it!

Rejoice

This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it!

May God bless you today.

Just a Call

Recently a friend called me to check on me. Frankly, I didn't believe it. I wondered what the reason she really called about. I have many people that often call me for help, and I give to them. Few people that call to give to me. I really am not complaining, I know people are busy. But when my friend called to check on me I was baffled. I waited for the "real" reason she called and there was none. She called just to check on me. I was touched, truly touched.

I thank my friends that care for me, and I am blessed to have many wonderful people in my life that do. But today I thank my friend that cares enough to call. May I follow her good example. Jesus cares and checks on us every day. So my friend was Jesus voice to me today. Thank you!

Just Breath

AWWWW....fresh air......

Recently I was diagnosed with two sleeping disorders. I was given a machine that makes me angry every night as I try to get it to fit right and the first two days felt no difference at all when I wore the machine. I grumbled to myself that I had just wasted a lot of money and now had one more chore to do every night. But, my good doctor had warned me it could take three weeks before I would feel the difference so I kept on going.

Then it happened. I felt air going into my lungs and the rhythm of my breathing kicked in and soaked up air as if I had been dieing, and I guess I really had. I gulped it down, and just was amazed at how much I needed it and was desperate for it. After a night of air filling my lungs I woke up a totally different person. I felt better and my attitude had lifted to a filling of joy and peace. For the first time in years I was able to fall into a deep sleep.

This has reminded me that it is the same way with the Holy Spirit. When I chose to live with a half done experience, I am dieing slowly. Being content to be religious and not immerse myself in Christ starves my soul. I want to burn like a fire for Jesus. Then I will be in peace and filled with joy.

Numbers On Our Head

When our daughter was only five her pet bird died. My mother and I quickly went to the pet store to find another bird which looked, to us, just like her pet. The only difference was a little band around its leg. We assumed that she would not see any difference and not feel the loss of her little bird. However, as soon as she came in she went to say hello to her bird. With out even a pause she screamed, "That's not Tweety!". She burst into tears as we explained that her little bird was dead.

I thought about that today. If a five year old can instantly spot a little bird being changed, and be so moved. What is it like to our Heavenly Father? I think He answers that himself. He says even our hairs our numbered. What a powerful amount of love He places to be so connected he counts our hairs- which recently I discovered are about 100,000! That's a lot of love!

Lonely When Together

I visited my daughter the last weekend. Oddly, when I visit I often feel bad. I miss her so intensely that when I think of going home I cry. So, though I enjoy the visit I know soon we will be separated again.

I wonder if it is that way with Jesus. He longs so much to have us home. I believe so.

Journey to Heaven

Recently I bid on a hotel site and got a very discounted rate. I was thrilled to be staying in a luxury hotel at a discounted rate; but once I was there I did not like it. It seemed they charged for everything. They clearly were in business to make money. I hated having my car hostage to parking. Any service that in my budget hotels was cheep or free, they charged for. And when I was in the lobby I felt out of my comfort zone wondering what careers these people had in their lives.

That reminded me of the journey to heaven. When Jesus comes, who will be comfortable there. It is God's grace that invites us, and his love that takes us. But those not there he leaves out. Is it because he does not love them? No. It is because they simply would be uncomfortable and out of place.

God loves us enough to want us all the time, but when we go to heaven it should be a place we feel great comfort. That is home.

The Conflict

Recently someone told me she was in conflict with another member in her the church. I was frustrated. I do understand when we are not thrilled with who sits by us in church. We don't get to pick our company all the time. But as I watch this friend struggle I am proud of her. Instead of giving up to her feelings, she is in prayer to change her attitude.

Isn't that what Jesus would have us to do? Ask him to change us, and be willing to give our attitude for the good of others.

Sometimes I face the same challenge. God lets someone be in my space I am not happy about. But God does not make mistakes and so I will pray and move. Hopefully, treating all around me with dignity, respect and love. That is what Jesus would do.

My Question

Last night the leadership in my church met. During this time we discussed some important issues. And those issues surrounded money. My question to myself is, what is my responsibility? Often I ask this question. And I don't really know the answer. So I keep praying. But the importance is where is my heart. Should God ask me to sell all I have, go on faith would I? Probably not. It would be a battle.

I don't feel God has called me to sell all I have. But, when he does, I am praying that I am willing to give it all to Jesus. Following Jesus should be more than lip service. Today, he has not asked. My prayer is that when he does, I joyfully turn all things to him. Pray for my heart.