A Question

There is a question that often haunts me. How do we meet the needs of those around us? Where do we draw the lines on our time? And what is balance. I pray a lot about this and as I get older I realize I simply can not do what I used to go. It grieves me as I try to sort out which person will get my time, money and commitment.

When my world is surrounded by pain, as I watch people I care about hurting. Then I just keep praying: Jesus come soon. I don't know the answer to my question of how to sort out my time. But I do know my prayers will be honored, and soon suffering will end.

I believe Jesus is coming, and what a glorious day when the answer to my question is that Jesus is here and there is no more sorrow or tears.

Is That A God Thing?

I had an unusual thing happen to me this week. I was struggling with terrible depression. This kind of depression is always one step from me going to suicidal thinking, and I always know when I get to that level I must get on my medications. Yet, on Sunday I wanted to go to church. It really did not make a lot of sense. I am a Sabbath keeper and attend church on Saturday. But my depression was so deep I did not know what to do with myself until the pharmacy opened and I could get my perscription filled. So I decided to go to a church on Sunday where I always enjoy the pastor.

The service helped me a lot but I still felt depressed and got my prescription filled. The remarkable thing was after one pill my depression broke. This medication is supposed to take three weeks.

What made the difference? I don't know. But, I believe God honored me as I tried to stay with him. So for the last two days my depression has been gone and I am happy. Is that a God thing? I chose to believe so.

A Powerful Promise

I know of many people that have been hit hard with troubles. Friends that can't find work, others over worked. Around me are many depressed people, and I have been too.

This week as I struggled with my own sad feelings I thought about it a lot. Where is God when we are "down and out"? Thinking about it I realized that His promise is that He will never leave or forsake us. It is in the dark times that we must press forward in faith. We must cling to the knowledge He has not forgotten us. Claim the promise and hold on. Then, when the clouds do part we will see more of His evidence and be at a great place in our experience.

Jesus never said it would be easy. He said he would never leave us. And that promise is a powerful one in storms of life.

One People

I don't get it. It seems that our culture takes joy in seeing people hurt one another. Recently I watched a reality show where one family made rude and unkind remarks to another family. Clearly one family had many more assets, but is that a license for superiority? I cringed as I saw the wealthy family insult the other family into tears.

And as I watched I realized the true wealthy family was the family that was gracious, warm and loving. Never did they insult in retaliation nor did they cower to become people they were not. They pushed together as a family, drawing love to help them through the storm.

I must check myself sometimes too. When I see people I don't feel matched with, what is my reaction. There are times I find myself pulling away from the "unlovely". But Jesus never did that. He sat with them. I am praying to be that kind of person. All people as one people: loved and purchased by God's blood.

Just the Right Answer

My friend had fallen into a terrible depression. I thought I knew why; but it was one of those situations where I did not know what to say, or how to say what I felt needed to be said. So I prayed and prayed. I prayed for my friend's depression. I prayed for the situation. I prayed that if it was God's will; I would be able to talk with my friend without hurting her. I did not want to embarrass her or damage our friendship either.

The next time I saw her, I smiled. She started to say something I knew was the open door for me to speak. I was gentle but honest. Soon tears ran down her face as she said I was exactly right. She thanked me many times for helping her to see the problem. Instead of hurting her we were drawn together.

Isn't it exciting when we see that God does answer our prayers. And while I was able to reach out to her, her confirmation that God was listening was what I needed. That is how God works!
He brings friends together to share and help each other grow. Thank you Jesus.

So Many Shorts

Well, I had a laugh at my own expense. I thought I needed some short for summer, so when the local store put out shorts I picked up three pairs. But, I had not taken my summer clothes out of storage and figured now was the time to do it. Lucky for me I kept the receipt because once my summer clothes were out I discovered I had 19 pairs of shorts! OK, that was a big surprise.

This made me laugh and I thought about my Christian experience. I need God, because sometimes I may feel like I have it in control; yet God sees the real picture. Where I may run thinking one thing he knows the truth. So when I wait on him, well I learn to see things more honestly.

Sometimes too I need to take an inventory of myself and God. Am I doing what God calls me or just playing a "spiritual game". Honestly I need to just put myself in God's view and not mine. Then the truth will come forward.

Jesus Values

I was reading that the most violent game ever produced is soon coming on the market. Some countries have banned the game, but America has not. I read that article with disgust and sadness. What is happening to our country that we no longer value things like peace, kindness and civil behavior. We need to entertain us we need to rip people apart, violate children and give up all symbols of integrity?

I am grieved that we no longer need God. Christians and non-Christians alike too often allow degradation of mankind. I believe that we, as Christians, need to get back to Jesus. Keep him before us in our minds. His values should be so imprinted on our minds, we are offended hurt and longing for his kingdom to be reestablished in us.

Brown Rice

Our waitress came and apologized for not giving me brown rice. My friend and I laughed because she never remembers brown rice. Every time we go I ask, but always get white. Why was this time any different? We explained why we were laughing and told her not to worry about it. She works by herself, and has a lot to remember. Brown rice or white rice is not going to make a big difference.



When we got ready she brought me a to-go drink on the house to apologize. I smiled. It is nice to have someone take responsibility for their actions.



I hope I can learn from this young woman's kindness. Do right, but when you screw up admit it; and take responsibility. Christian's should be the leaders in these kind of things, don't you think?

Just One

I have a deal with God. I will lead the Women's Group in my church as long as one woman comes. That has been since September and it is now the end of May. I think that God certainly must have a sense of humor. For each week I have one woman, rarely two. But...that does not matter to me.

If God sends one faithful, then I will be faithful also. God the Father was willing to send His son for just one also. And because he did, our world was saved. Thank you Jesus. You love all of us enough to change the universe over just one....

Humbled of God

Today, as I was driving to church I just took time to look at the world of loveliness around myself. Trees of many colors, blue sky and friendly faces. I felt over whelmed with the amount of love God puts in our daily lives.

How often do I forget those simple things I take as common? The blue sky, the friends, a compassionate husband; healthy family. Today I felt humbled as I thought of what a wonderful world God has given me. Thank you Jesus!

An Avalanche of Kindness

In our local news was a report of a boy that won some prize money. He decided to donate his prize for food for the homeless. An employee of a local grocery store saw his unselfish deed and she donated prize money she had won. The store hearing of these two people's unselfishness donated groceries. The return on the boys original donation was over 600%.

Isn't it amazing when one unselfish act can snow ball into an avalanche of kindness!

Blazing Hot

It is blazing hot here, it is almost 30 degrees past normal and we have done little today. We are tired, hot and worn out. Our airconditioner never dropped past 90 all day.

In times past we would have pushed ourselves regardless of the temperatures. We are work-a-holics. And this kind of life style is out of balance. I had chores to do today but all of them could wait for another day. As I sat with a fan blowing on me, I kept thanking God for time to sit.

I spent a long time in praise to God over just time to rest and have a fan blow on me. Worn out, and resting made a peaceful day of praise. Don't you think sometimes God is most honored when we take the time to praise him for simple things? I end the day praising him just for a quiet day. For rest is part of his plan as well as non-stop work.

So What?

I went to the doctor today and he told me my illness is progressing....Oh good! I left feeling a bit of self pity. Who ever asks for any illness? I have bipolar. On one hand he said I am doing really well, but warned me this is a progressive illness and as he described the "next" level I realized I am already there.

I went to the valley of self pity for a bit. But, what does that accomplish? Nothing. God promises that he will never leave or forsake us. So what am I accomplishing feeling sorry for me? Nothing. If God is going to be with me through this; well no matter what happens. I am not alone.

Jesus never says life will be easy. But he does say he walks with us. Isn't that a comfort that we face nothing alone?

So for today... I will chose to see joy. And it is all around me.

Opt Out

Someone wrote me an email that she was not coming to the Women's Group because someone was there that she did not like. I smiled a bitter- sweet smile. I could understand. I am on a leadership meeting with someone I don't like.

The difference in our thinking is that I am still attending. I believe that God makes no mistakes. If someone is on the leadership meeting I don't like. I have many choices. I talk to the person meeting privately, and in love, as the Bible suggest; and try to work things out. I also can try to live in peace, despite the person is there. I can bottle a lot of resentment up. I can become bitter. Or I can pray to Jesus to help me see the person as He does.

I have chosen the later. That person is trying to follow God, and I am his spiritual sister. Families stick together. We don't always have to agree, but in heaven we are all welcome. I better develop a loving heart here or I will be miserable there. And I don't want to opt out of heaven because my brother is there.

Happy Mother's Day

When God made mother's he made a marvelous creation. I would like to thank all mother's that have given for their children. Though you may not be perfect, you have made a difference.

To my mother- I say that she has to be a model of a godly woman. She loves God, loves others and has been a faithful and unselfish mother. No words can express my mom, as she is wonderful. Happy Mother's Day to all.

Jesus is Coming! Whatever.....

My whole life I have heard, "Jesus is coming! Better get ready...." And at age 54, that phrase loses it meaning when said too often. But, recently I am hearing it again and I really do wonder if this is not the time. The disasters that Jesus told about, are happening. The behavior of children he told about, are happening too. I can't think of one thing that is not happening he said.

But there is a change in me. When I was young I worried. What if I was not ready. What if I was not good enough...on and on.

Today, I rest. I know that my relationship with God is a love relationship. I know that if he comes; I will be ready. If he does not come, I stand at the window of my life just waiting with eager expectation. My Father says he will come, and I believe him!

Understanding Fasting

This week I decided to commit all of my time that was not working or doing ministry to study and reading about Jesus and my faith. It is my own fast. I am starting to understand the purpose of fasting.

When we make a commitment to sacrifice anything it keeps us focused. When we normally would take part in an activity we must stop and think. What is the purpose of our choice. It is then that we can offer prayer of praise and petition. I also am observing that these moments keep us focus on higher thinking.

I don't totally understand fasting but I do understand it enough to know it works. And, I am going to start doing it more often. I want to see Jesus.

Embarrassed Jesus

I must have embarrassed Jesus today. Let's just say that my behavior while driving was not very Christian. I am glad that I don't have a fish on the back of my car to embarrass the whole Christian faith.

Looking on my behavior today I am not very proud. I did not keep my temper. I acted rude to people while driving and in the end did not live up to my own value system. I wish I had done so much better.

But, I am thankful because I know that Jesus has already forgiven me. He knows I am sorry for my behavior and say to me, "Just get up, and get going Linda." And so tomorrow I have a fresh day.

The Same Today

When I watched the documentary about Hitler, Bonhoeffer and the Germans a frightening thing happened. I realized the similarities then to now.

The German people were sucked into lies as they were in oppressive financial times. They grabbed on to a leader that took them into violation of man kind and were led by "faith" without God. Many churches embraced racism. The true gospel of love and care for man was lost. Bias, selfish interest and fear dictated the atrocity of the Holocaust.

And isn't that the way it is today? Too many people allow others to do their thinking. The economy has many people in fear. And the many Christian's are willing to let their local church dictate their beliefs, instead of humbling themselves before God.

Our duty, is to stand on God's word 100%; if it is popular or not. Only knowing Christ personally will give us the courage to stand firm in affliction.

Bonhoeffer

OK, my daughter introduced me to Netflick. I love it. I can rent documentaries, and I just saw one which has me almost speechless. Bonhoeffer. It tells of a man so committed to his faith he dies saving the Jews. I am humbled, and hope that I may also be able to be committed to God to the point of sacrificing my life. Christianity that is too easy, is too easy. Christianity should call the worshiper to sacrifice.

It Made Me Think

Recently I watched a documentary about a boy raised by drug hippies.

The story did not turn out as I thought. The boy turned into a respectable young man with a career. He became an electrician, married and had a family.

Yet his sister marrried at the age of 14; had five children by the time she was 22 and worked as a maid. The father never took responsibilities. At age 60 he lives in a small travel trailer behind a relatives home. The mother divorced and ended up doing daycare.

What made the difference in the boys life? His grand parents. They taught him goals and to work. They contrasted the parent's life with theirs, and he to model his life after them.

Several things pulled at my heart strings. The sadness he had on his face as he reflected on the life of his father. And, I was struck by the fact his grand parents had made such an impact. It was humbling, and let me know that we all have responsibilities to those around us. We never know who we will influence. Our influence may rescue someone else in their life.

Isn't that true in our Christian experience too? We have a responsibility to offer hope to those around us. It may be a kind word, gentle deed or a listening heart. We are not our own.

Fasting

I have never done much fasting. I have heard no sermons on it, and know few people who did it. But reading about it I wondered why we were not fasting. So my husband and I both fasted over a family matter. Our prayer was answered. We have fasted twice, and agree each time we see results. But in America little is ever spoken about fasting.

Now I am reading and studying and I am convinced mountains do not move because people are not fasting. If you fast, tell me about it. I am trying to learn about this part of ministry.

Thank you....

"Thank you for being my friend...I have never had many friends." I did not feel good when my "friend" thanked me. I really was not much of a friend. I had listened to this man in church, tried to be respectful.... but friend....well that was a stretch. Inside I felt embarrassed and ashamed. I had not been the friend I really could have been. I, too, thought he was a bit "weird" and did not make myself all that available. So his comments hurt me.

I regret that I still have some growth to do. Everyone that comes to church should receive the same treatment, but when I reviewed my self: I realized I had not been as friendly as I should have been.

Lord help me treat all people totally equal. You did.

Tithe

I had a wrong idea about tithe. Somehow I had this idea that tithe was a duty, much like a tax to Christian's and to not pay tithe was well....very bad. So I wrote out my checks faithfully. But recently I realized I was wrong. Tithe is a tax, but not as I viewed it. It was a love gift from me to God. It is saying, "I trust you to provide for me, and I respect you enough to give back to you." It is a love gift from God as well. It is he way to show me he is faithful.

God does not need my money, but he does need my appreciation. He has promised that when I tithe he will abundantly pour out more. And, I have seen that is true. Tithing is my way to see God is faithful.

The more I learn about God, the more I like. It is good to know God planned a program that helps me be unselfish, appreciative and to see how faithful God can be!

Amazing!

I watched a video today of a young man 24, with no limbs. But he is praising God. It is humbling. I wish I knew how to make a link, but I can't. This is the address though.

Watch and be blessed.

www.wretch.cc/video/ritachsia&func=single&vid=2282608&o=time&p=0

Rest in Jesus Arms

I would be telling a lie to say I never see abusive behavior in church. Unkind words, gossip or some other bad things. I do see it and it is often very painful. It can cause a person to lose hope and become worn out. Maybe that person's last hope is the fellowship of the church family and when we let them down, we hurt one of God's children. We hurt God.

I have been a victum of this abuse. I do understand the pain, loneliness and feelings of dispare. And to that I want to say, I am sorry to all that have been there but don't lose faith. Don't stop worship. Jesus is still beside you.

God has not forgotten us. The Enemy will seek to destroy anyone, anywhere. It is then that I believe we need to RUN to Jesus. Cry to Him, let Him rock us in his arms. Then....get up. He has a work for everyone, and He still is wanting to use us.


Love others, love God. That is what gives the Christian power to forgive, get up and move. Sinners are welcome in God's house. That is why so many of us are there. We need his healing.

Someone's Missing Here

I hear of people that stop coming to church for different reasons. Some reasons seem shallow and others seem real. Each person has a different reason. But, I am always sad when anyone stops coming. They special to me.

Jesus tells us to not forsake the fellowship of the brethren. Why is that? I believe that in fellowship we become better people. Sometimes it is our privilege to receive. We love the music, fellowship, sermon etc. That is a high day. But, other times I believe God places us in church for what we can give. It is service that Jesus wants, and sometimes God takes us where we can serve. These are the times we may grow the most.

Right now, I am having a hard time with one of our members. He strikes everything in me wrong. I find him offensive and I see him a lot. One day I was stewing and fretting after one of his remarks. I was angry, but then I realized this is exactly what Satan wanted. He wanted conflict because Satan loves to destroy relationships. He wants us not in fellowship. So I dropped to me knees and prayed. I asked God to help me see the good in that person. I asked God to forgive my attitude of a critical nature.

Did he answer? Yes. I still have issues with that person. But, the good is working because I am still in prayer. And eventually my attitude will change. Soon I will be loving this man as Jesus does, flaws and all.

Fellowship brings growth. And I want to keep growing.

Just Ask....

Sometimes I have to review my thinking. I get all worked up and think I have an answer and I forget to ask God first. Or I ask but get impatient and forget to wait for the answer. As I get restless I also don't listen as well.

One of the things that I am learning is to wait on God more. When I quietly wait, and wait patiently I am amazed how he answered my question.

It is a skill I have not mastered but one I am working on. So I will ask for guidance and wait patiently.

Not Discouraged

Yesterday we celebrated the National Day of Prayer in our church. We only had one person show up during the day and nine people showed up for closing prayer. Was I discouraged? Not at all. It is not volume that matters to God it is the heart.

I know that many of my membership are very committed to God. They love Him and they are living His teachings. They pray, even if not in the church. They live their faith. God is interested in the heart. Though members did not show up, God saw them in their homes.

Paint the House

I am hurting all over. My husband and I are painting the outside of our house. I guess my old body is not used to climbing and pushing its self. Reminds me of faith. Both take work, but are well worth it when we see the results.

Hey, can you hear me?

"Hey, can you hear me?"

I saw an eye looking at me through my fence. My neighbor. There is not shy bone in his body and he cracks me up. No matter what happens, he find a way to let me know about it. And often he just makes me laugh.

That is what being like a child is I think. Lovingly wanting to spend time with your friends. I wonder how many times Jesus looks into our life and says, "Hey, can you hear me?" Just because he wants to be part of our world.

Controversial Christian

Well, I have changed my blog So/So Christians to Controversial Christian. Come post. Go to blogger.com Then enter Controversial Christian. Thanks.

Why?

I was working and thinking, praying. Why is it Christian's often are OK with media which portrays them as idiots. Are we? Do we deserve the label. Frankly, sometimes I think we do. We tend to make up answers when we don't know an honest answer. As my friend says, we have Christian lies. For example: we often show life as all black and white. Follow Jesus and all your problems will go away. Does that happen? No!

And I am thinking of starting another blog! Controversial Christian. I really don't want to be controversial but I do want a platform where thinking Christians can find a place to meet. Why not discuss real questions? Why do children get sick? I don't know, but have faith anyway. Why do we settle to have the media show us as non-thinking people? What is our responsibility? Do we write politely but firmly to ask for Christians as normal people? Just thinking out loud I guess. Pray about it for me, would you? Thanks.

If You Want to Be Better

"If you want to be a better person, surround yourself with better people."

I do wish I could give credit to the speaker that spoke these words. I was busy in my kitchen as my husband listened to a motivational speaker. That was over 20 years since I heard those words. But, I have lived by them since. Surrounding myself with better people does not mean people that speak back all the time. Sometimes I surround myself with lives of people from books. Sometimes from programing. Sometimes in worship.

What I surround myself by, makes who I am. So I demand the best company. It has made me a better person. And, when I meditate on Jesus I realize he was the highest standard. He gave his life to change a world. What more could he have done?

A Grumbler

The children or Israel and I had something in common yesterday. I was grumbling and frustrated. My furniture is worn out, old and ugly. But, the economy is tight and so is our budget. So I spent my time complaining about it. Poor me!

Now I am trying to live by a new standard. I want to do better so I placed my self in the living room and started working. Despite my furniture could get a record for ugly and old, I would do my best to make my living room the best it could be. I started pushing furniture around. I cleaned the carpet and stained a table. When it was done I looked with satisfaction at the new arrangement and all I had accomplished. This empowered me!

Christian life means looking beyond grumbling and doing what we can, regardless of what is in our way: including worn out furniture. The end results is peace and happiness. Now I think I will go and settle in my "new living room".......

Well I Hope So

"Are you really going to stick with this?", my friend asked. She was asking if I would stick to a plan to push myself harder based on reading the book Do It Hard. I don't know. I have always tried to push myself and so I do hope to continue. I think the important thing is to set a goal to always be on the improve side of life. I believe challenging myself will bring higher standards.

Christian's, I believe should be goal setters. They should be standard breakers. But, with that responsibility should come the love of God. They should be humble, goal setters and more than expected. So, to answer my friend....well I hope so.