Turkey-Europe The Widening Gap

Prepared by Carin Zissis

Turkey-Europe The Widening Gap
A supporter of the True Path Party marches under a giant Turkish flag during an anti-France protest. (AP/Murad Sezer)
October 24, 2006

The possibility of Turkish EU accession appears increasingly uncertain. In recent weeks, European leaders have voiced unease over Ankara’s membership bid, citing concerns over Turkey’s infringement on freedom of expression and its embargo on Cypriot ships and planes (AP), the latter a manifestation of a long-standing dispute over division of the Aegean Sea with Greece. Some EU members, including France and Germany, have suggested Turkey seek “privileged partnership” rather than full membership. Olli Rehn, commissioner of EU enlargement, opposed this idea, but warned the Turkish accession process that began in October 2005 has been slowed by Ankara’s failure to repeal Article 301, which gives the government free reign to arrest journalists and activists for disparaging Turkey. In an interview with the BBC, EU President Jose Manuel Barroso said it could take twenty years for Turkey to become a member nation.

Recent events have done little to ease growing EU-Turkey tensions and Europe seems hesitant to absorb the overwhelmingly Muslim nation of more than 70 million people. France’s parliament recently angered Ankara when it decided to make criminal the denial of mass killings of Armenians under the Ottoman Empire. The law was condemned by Turkish author Orhan Pamuk (Reuters), who was previously indicted under Article 301 for raising the issue of the genocide and who received the Nobel Prize for Literature the same day the French rule passed. Europe-Turkey relations also took a hit last month when Pope Benedict XVI’s comments about Mohammed sparked widespread Muslim protests and temporarily put the pope’s November visit to Turkey in doubt.

Experts say such obstacles to Turkey’s EU membership could lead to missed opportunities for making inroads in Christian-Muslim relations. Denis MacShane, Britain’s former Europe minister, writes in the Financial Times that the Armenian genocide had little to do with modern Turkey and warns against Europe’s increasingly demeaning attitude toward Ankara. He asks, “How much longer will this secular, democratic, Muslim country look westwards to a European future, instead of turning east?” Sedat Laciner, director of Ankara-based think tank International Strategic Research Organization, criticizes “unsuccessful politicians” in Europe for condemning his country, and argues that EU accession would help “erode the unilateral policies” of the United States and Israel in the Middle East by drawing Europe closer to the region.

The problems in Europe coincide with a breakdown in U.S.-Turkey relations, despite Washington’s support for the country’s EU membership. This Council Special Report from June describes the “fractured alliance” and says that although Washington and Ankara agree that an Iraq splintered into three independent states is not in either country’s interests, Turkey is frustrated by the U.S. handling of the Iraqi war. Tensions also exist over America’s failure to support the Turkish fight against the separatist Kurdistan Workers’ Party (PKK). In an August interview, CFR Fellow Steven A. Cook said the United States is unwilling to go after PKK cells in northern Iraq because “it would be foolhardy from a military perspective…to go after the PKK and destabilize the one region where people really aren't shooting at Americans.” Michael Rubin of the American Enterprise Institute says the United States is too soft on Turkey’s government (WSJ) and U.S. diplomats should stop delivering “PC platitudes” that fail to address the “anti-secular agenda” of Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan and his Justice and Development Party.

From Powerless to Powerful

By Lacy Enderson

Looking back over my life I am amazed at what God has done for me.

I grew up as a believer. But, I was a powerless Christian. I attended Church from the age of eight. I wanted to be well behaved like all the other boys and girls in my Sunday school class, but my behavior was just the opposite. I had a foul mouth and an anger problem from a young age. As I grew into adolescence the anger intensified and depression developed. I watched as the kids from my church sat and ate lunch together engaging in cheerful camaraderie. I felt guilty joining them because I spent my weekends at parties drinking beer and smoking pot. I felt miserable most of the time. I wanted the joy my friends displayed, but I honestly didn’t know how to get it. It seemed like every time I tried to be like them I fell flat on my face.

After high school I became a college dropout, got pregnant and got married in that order. I had three children by the age of 22 and I was divorced by age 24. That long hall of sadness mixed with rage grew longer every day. I knew God was with me because I was taught that He was, but I couldn’t feel Him. I never doubted God’s existence, what I doubted was myself. I remember a Bible study with a group of women who taught that Jesus was not God and that’s what I believed. How could God’s son be God? My friends from church said, “Lacy, be careful.” But, they didn’t know what they were talking about. These were great people with a sound doctrine and I liked the time we spent together in the Word. The Holy Spirit was working in my spirit because I went to a Bible bookstore and bought eight different books on the reasons why this certain group of believers were wrong. During my reading I did an awesome study of the trinity, the eyes of my heart were enlightened and all of a sudden I knew who God was. It was such an amazing revelation I couldn’t wait to share it with my study group friends. But, they weren’t as happy as I was and our meetings came to an end.

My relationship with God continues growing stronger everyday. Character transformation is a process. I didn’t come to the realization of who God is and all of a sudden walk into newness of life. I was still smoking, drinking, fornicating and partying practically everyday. I was still very angry and depressed and after the divorce extreme loneliness set in. I finally knew God, but now He had to change me. God said in His Word He would transform me by the renewing of my mind. He began that day and the manifestation of that transformation is still taking place.

The hardest part about living a Christian life was trusting God to take care of my needs. I had grown so accustomed to worrying about everything I had no idea how I was suppose to lay my cares at His feet. The worries and concerns of life were the reasons I drank, smoked, overate and looked for new relationships continually. I used these vices to escape responsibility. I abused substances to dull the pain of a harsh reality. But, as I practiced letting go of the problems and allowing God to take care of them I saw Him actually working in my life. I found I no longer needed the substances I craved. One nasty bad habit at a time disappeared and I am free at last.

Lacy Enderson writes from Simi Valley, California.
You can order a copy of her book: “Addiction: A Personal Story” at lacysjourney.com lacysriches@aol.com

A Good Day

By Debbie Daley

“Have a good day” is something frequently said
In my mind I often think, it’s always bad instead

Why can’t my way be easy, leisurely and fun?
Can’t I just do what I want, until the day is done?

I look at some around me, who seem to have it good
Do they ever have a problem? I’d trade them if I could

In my unhappy state, I ask the Lord “Why me?”
Can’t I have a good day, instead of misery?

Then He gently shows me, “You’re looking the wrong way
There’s blessing all around you, it’s not all bleak and gray

The challenges I have for you, serve to make you strong,
In spite of what the world says, this selfishness is wrong

Your joy is my concern, it won’t be found in leisure
In serving and giving and in my purpose is pleasure

Stop looking at the day, seeing only work and strife
But see the value in the lessons, the art of living life”

When I commit my day to Him, and take the time to pray
Regardless of the ups and downs, I can have a “good day”

Debbie Daley writes from Jacksonville, Oregon. kddaley@earthlink.net

It's Not All About Me

By Linda Callahan

Recently I have been concerned with my attitude and Christian experience. I am discovering an ugly attitude. Raised in the 70's, propaganda was heard in popular culture everywhere and I bought into it. The basic idea that you are your own person and could do what you wanted.
"Do your own thing"
"You have your rights!"
"I'm my own boss"
and the ever popular - "If it feels good--do it!"

As a young woman these ideas seemed so right to me. After all, wasn’t I the person that lived in my body? Why shouldn't I be the one to make my own decisions? And why shouldn't I be the one to have rights, do what I feel, and live as I wanted?

Now I see that these basic ideas have one central theme: self and selfishness. The more I study Jesus and His followers, I discover that their slogans would be totally different.

"Serve God and others,”
"Give up your life for something better"
and "In dying you will live."

My early ideas and the ideas of God's true servants seem to be far apart. There is no self in their ideas. They gave up homes, families and friends, even life, for service.

But, I like my selfish life-style. I like having a nice home. I like going out with friends. I like eating out. I like new clothes...I like, like and more of I like! But, as I pray about this, I am asking: "What would Jesus do?" It is humbling.

I am sure that Jesus also liked many things. He liked Heaven. He liked no suffering. He liked being with His Father--but He gave up His own comforts for me. Yes, it was all about me, and His love for me that took so much from Him--but gave so much to me.

Linda Callahan writes from Central Point, Oregon.

I Believe . . .

I believe…that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.

I believe…that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

I believe…that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I believe…that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.

I believe…that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I believe…that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I believe…that you can keep going long after you think you can't.

I believe…that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I believe…that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I believe…that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I believe…that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I believe…that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

I believe…that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down, will be the ones to help you get back up.

I believe…that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I believe…that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.

I believe…that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I believe…that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.

I believe…that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I believe…that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life
forever.

I believe…two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

I believe…that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.

I believe…that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you - you will find the strength to help.

His Blood Runs Warm

By Sheri Del Core

The blood of Jesus still runs warm. I first heard this phrase during a Bible study class. The impact of this expression, which is both shocking and mind blowing, actually helped me better grasp the truth of being covered in the blood of Jesus. Thinking about real, living, warm blood is at first somewhat gruesome, but when meditating on it further it occurred to me that when I was dead in my transgressions, I was dead cold. The life giving warmth of the blood of Christ covered my frozen and failing heart-- spiritual hypothermia--and breathed new life into my congealing spirit. I’m not only presented to God as holy by this sacred covering that washes away my sin and makes me clean but I’m also given life by its warmth and vitality. His blood is living, flowing and warm. Just think of it. It will not dry up or run out, and it has no limits. There is enough to cover every single person ever created.

“But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.” Ephesians 2:13

With physical hypothermia the body gets so cold breathing slows and the heart quivers instead of beats. A person appears dead: cold, unresponsive, without breath or pulse, and their eyes won’t respond to light. Applied spiritually does this sound familiar? This is an accurate description of the state of my soul before I accepted CPR from Jesus. Jesus being who he is went even further and gave me a blood transfusion. Now we’re related! How cool is that? Or should I say warm.

“For if you live according to the sinful nature, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live, because those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba Father.” The Spirit himself testifies with our spirits that we are God’s children.” Romans 8:12-16

First aid instructions for hypothermia states that one should never assume a person is dead. They may look as good as dead but we’re always to assume they’re alive. Trust that there is hope, that breath and life can be restored. When we’re ready and willing to be rescued Jesus moves us out of the cold, warms us by sharing his body heat, never leaves us alone and never gives up hope. He doesn’t just jumpstart us; he pours his Spirit into us, affecting every part of our being.

“…because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in our transgressions--it is by grace you have been saved.” Ephesians 2: 4-5

Sheri Del Core writes from Aptos, California. sheridc@pacbell.net

Grandma’s Hands

By Adele Cossette

Grandma, some ninety plus years, sat feebly on the patio bench. She didn't move, just sat with her head down staring at her hands. When I sat down beside her she didn't acknowledge my presence and the longer I sat I wondered if she was OK. Finally, not really wanting disturb her but wanting to check on her at the same time, I asked her if she was OK.

She raised her head and looked at me and smiled. "Yes, I'm fine, thank you for asking," she said in a clear strong voice. "I didn't mean to disturb you, Grandma, but you were just sitting here staring at your hands and I wanted to make sure you were OK," I explained to her.

"Have you ever looked at your hands?" she asked. "I mean really looked at your hands?" I slowly opened my hands and stared down at them. I turned them over, palms up and then palms down. No, I guess had never really looked at my hands as I tried to figure out the point she was making. Grandma smiled and related this story: "Stop and think for a moment about the hands you have, how they have served you well throughout your years.

”These hands, though wrinkled, shriveled and weak have been the tools I have used all my life to reach out and grab and embrace life. They braced and caught my fall when as a toddler I crashed upon the floor. They put food in my mouth and clothes on my back. As a child my mother taught me to fold them in prayer. They tied my shoes and pulled on my boots.

”They held my husband and wiped my tears when he went off to war. They have been dirty, scraped and raw, swollen and bent.

“They were uneasy and clumsy when I tried to hold my newborn son. Decorated with my wedding band they showed the world that I was married and loved someone special. They wrote my letters to him and trembled and shook when I buried my parents and spouse. They have held my children and grandchildren, consoled neighbors, and shook in fists of anger when I didn't understand. They have covered my face, combed my hair, and washed and cleansed the rest of my body.

”They have been sticky and wet, bent and broken, dried and raw. And to this day when not much of anything else of me works real well these hands hold me up, lay me down, and again continue to fold in prayer.

”These hands are the mark of where I've been and the ruggedness of life. But more importantly it will be these hands that God will reach out and take when he leads me home. And with my hands He will lift me to His side and there I will use these hands to touch the face of Christ."

Tempered Apparel, LLC
www.temperedapparel.com
info@temperedapparel.com

Living Water Couseling Center

FOCUS ON MINISTRY
By Eddie Janisch

In a perfect world there would be no broken people and no one would be in need of healing. Families would live in love harmony and there would be no divorce. Kids would grow up to well-rounded adults capable of forming deep and lasting relationships. Fear, loneliness, and hurt would be nonexistent in such a world and the people would live in peace.

The fallen world we live in, however, is about as far from that slice of heaven as you can get. Satan has his iron in the fire here and is determined to have his say in the matter before the true master returns. Even as Christians, we face an uphill battle to live a balanced and worthwhile life that reflects the love of our master.

While ministry and prayer point us in the right direction often times past hurts and hang ups prevent us from experiencing God’s love on a heart level. While counseling can help us identify and resolve those issues, often times we wind up no closer to God, and the true healing He promises, than when we began.

Living Water Counseling is first and foremost a ministry dedicated to providing quality counseling rooted in Biblical principles. With Jesus Christ as the center and the Holy Bible as the final authority, the counseling they provide fills a vital need in the Christian community. Living Water was developed because of God’s call for the church to help meet the mental, emotional, and spiritual needs of the people as they grow in Christ likeness. Working hand in hand with local churches and community organizations Living Water seeks to fill the void when deep-rooted issues need to be resolved that can not be met through existing ministries.

In addition to individual counseling Living Water offers classes in Couple’s Communication and Family Life Skills. Lives are being changed and families are being restored in each of these classes. Participants are growing in their understanding of their relationship with Jesus Christ and in the process are finding true peace and happiness in lives that often times have known only pain and hurt. God is at work rebuilding lives and preparing His children for the day He will bring them home.

“The people walking in darkness have seen a great light. On those living in the land of the shadow of death, a light has dawned.” Isaiah 9:2

Living Water Counseling Center is a ministry of Trinity Presbyterian Church. Services are provided on a sliding fee scale. For more information please call 541-840-1924 or contact by e-mail at lwchannah@hotmail.com

Eddie Janisch writes from Central Point, Oregon.

Miss Rose White

By Jennifer Anne Messing

Rated PG for some thematic elements.
*Recommended for viewing by adults with kids, ages 12 and up. Parental input advised.*
Check your favorite video rental stores for availability.

Miss Rose White is a one-hour, thirty-five minute, 1992 Hallmark Hall of Fame/Republic Pictures film release, in color, directed by Joseph Sargent, starring Kyra Sedgwick, Maximilian Schell and Amanda Plummer, with a special appearance by Maureen Stapleton. This Emmy award-winning drama about family relationships will provide insightful and thought-provoking entertainment which is appropriate during this Thanksgiving month.

Rayzel Weiss (Kyra Sedgwick), who is known as Rose White, is a young career woman living in Manhattan in the early 1940s with a promising future ahead of her. Rayzel Weiss and her father, Mordecai Weiss (Maximilian Schell) had fled Poland when Rayzel was a young girl and before Hitler invaded Poland. Unfortunately, Rayzel’s mother and older sister were left behind in Poland at the time and did not come to America.

Rayzel keeps up the ties with her other family members currently living in Manhattan by getting together with them once a week for dinner. One evening, Mordecai Weiss informs the family that he has received word that Rayzel’s sister, Lucia Weiss (Amanda Plummer), is alive and somehow survived after World War II and will be arriving in Manhattan in two weeks. Rayzel is immediately filled with joy, surprise and apprehension, all at once—wondering if she’ll be able to get along with her long-lost sister who is virtually a complete stranger to her.

When Lucia arrives and during the weeks when Rayzel and she are getting better acquainted, Rayzel becomes aware of many things about her past and her heritage that she had already forgotten and hoped to leave as forgotten. Both Rayzel and Lucia soon discover that the road to developing a friendship between them as adult sisters is fraught with many bumps, twists and surpising turns. In discovering the secrets of their family’s past, Rayzel and Lucia also come to terms with their need to speak with their father and deal with some difficult issues so they can be released from any ghosts from the past and move on with their lives.

Though Rayzel has always appeared to be a confident and self-assured young woman, she soon finds out that her unresolved issues are threatening to keep her from moving ahead in her career and in her relationships. Then, Lucia Weiss discovers that an important person from her past whom she knew in Poland is still alive and is also arriving in Manhattan very soon. Amid the strain of getting Lucia established in her own apartment and the awkwardness caused by many years of estrangement, the entire Weiss family strives to come together in a new bond of unity, understanding, and love as they face the unknown future together.

Miss Rose White will probably bring some tears to your eyes at one time or another. It is a touching and realistic family drama with themes that many can relate to. One of the film’s main themes is the overall emotional health a person derives from acceptance—acceptance of one’s family and one’s heritage. Family and heritage are two significant things that determine much of a person’s uniqueness and character traits. Attempting to deny one’s family background and heritage is like suppressing a very vital part of who we really are. As Rayzel Weiss began to acknowledge and accept her true family background and heritage in many ways some of the missing puzzle pieces in her life were found.

Another important theme this movie deals with is the importance of forgiveness in maintaining healthy family relationships on an ongoing basis. A few of the memorable scenes in this movie portrayed how asking for, as well as extending forgiveness to family members—even from hurts inflicted on one long ago—can still bring the soothing balm of healing to one’s heart that brings peace and closure. In Ephesians 4:32 (NASB) we are reminded: “And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.”

A highlight of Miss Rose White is the authentic and sensitive acting performances of the actresses who played Rayzel Weiss and Lucia Weiss, Kyra Sedgwick and Amanda Plummer. Maureen Stapleton offers a strong support role performance as Rayzel’s aunt, Tante Perla. The fine acting, intriguing storyline, rich dialogue, and gently moving musical score all come together in a movie that will provide heartwarming entertainment for families. Happy Thanksgiving!

Jennifer Anne Messing is an author and speaker from Portland currently serving as president of the Oregon Christian Writers.
JenniferAnneMessing@comcast.net,
or www.JenniferAnneMessing.com

Making Change

By Bob Hansen

God, in his infinite wisdom, made people different from each other. Some might view this as a source of frustration. Actually, this wondrous fact deserves celebration. So, whenever my wife and I happen on an issue which we view differently, we typically smile and say with a sense of awe, “Isn’t God great.”

This variability has give rise to the statement, “There are two kinds of people in this world” Just the other day I discovered another area in which this is true.

My wife and I were at Wendy’s restaurant with our daughter and some friends. After placing our order, the pleasant employee informed us: “That will be $11.20.”

In my usual manner I reached into my pocket, pulled out a twenty, and placed it on the counter.
To my surprise, my wife said, “Let me see if I have the right change.”

It was at that precise point that I realized there are two types of people in this world: people who will attempt to make exact change and those who will not bother.

My first reaction was to encourage my wife to put away her purse and not bother. I even glanced behind us to see how many people were waiting in line. But then I realized that if I stifled her urges, I might be fighting against the way God had created her.

To me, this issue is a matter of expediency. It seems most efficient to throw down a bill, grab the resulting change and stuff it in my pocket. When I get home, I simply empty my pockets and throw the coins in a drawer. Matter closed.

It’s an uncomplicated system that works quite well. Sure the coins do pile up after awhile. (I suppose the government doesn’t like this, as it forces them to make millions of extra coins.) But, in leaner times, it’s handy to find that I this coin reservoir in reserve.

I can only speak from the viewpoint of an outside observer, but my wife’s view of change-making is somewhat different. To her, having the exact change makes her feel good. There seems to be a sense of rightness about it. I believe it’s similar to the feeling one gets from recycling aluminum pop cans. If she can provide the right combination of coins, she has done something good for the universe.

There is certainly a sense in which my wife’s point of view is higher than mine. I remember times when I have been mildly annoyed by an “Exact Changer.” The check-out person announces the amount and the purchaser in front of me says, “Just a minute. I think I have the right change.” She quickly hands over the bills, but then the real search begins. It seems that often the coins are stored in an entirely different region of the purse.

Eventually the coin purse is located, but often this only provides a partial answer. “I was sure I had a couple of pennies in here somewhere.” Thus the search continues as minutes tick away. I’m not saying this to criticize the person who likes to make the right change. Instead, I’m admitting that my annoyance reveals a flaw in my character. Exact changers don’t have this flaw.

As we sat down to eat at Wendy’s that day, I questioned our friends about their attitudes toward making change. The husband voiced his opinion that movers and shakers don’t bother with trying to give the correct change. It was clear that his habit was the same as mine. However, his wife, like mine, made an argument for the opposite viewpoint.

Both sides searched their minds for scriptures to back up their position. A couple of passages were tried. I recalled that God said: “Behold, I changeth not.” But it was determined that I was misrepresenting the intent of that passage. In the end, no appropriate verses were found. I suppose this proves my point about this being a glorious difference that cames from God’s immense creativity.
If I were forced to choose between the two views, I’d have to say that my wife has the better approach. I think I should learn from her and slow down a bit. I believe I should seek to discover the joys of making exact change, and the sense of fulfillment that comes from having completed this simple task.
Yes, I should do that. But not right now. I’m in too big a hurry.

Bob Hansen writes from Chelhalis, Washington.

Repentance More Than Just “I’m Sorry”

By Kelvin James

“Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is near.”
--Matthew 4:17 (NIV)

How many times have we heard this command from our religious taskmasters? Within the confines of church walls, even on street corners, pastors and sidewalk preachers alike belt out this refrain as if the end is only moments away. Because of this the word “repent” when spoken to me, reverberates in my soul like a gunshot in the wilderness. I have often wondered why. Is it the authority with which one speaks the word, repent? Maybe. But, when I read a call to “repent” I am left on edge. I feel moved to do something—immediately—like, well, repent. There was a point in my youthful days that whenever I heard, or just read, the word repent, I began to say “I’m sorrys” to God for all of the wrongs I could remember at the time. At the time it made plenty of sense to me because from my early childhood I feared God. I yearned to stay on His good side. I was taught early that if I did something wrong, asked God for forgiveness He would forgive. That sounded good to a thug kid growing up.

Later in life I discovered that repentance was more than just asking God for forgiveness, it was about turning away from my transgressions and never repeating them. I gained a clear understanding of this through another’s misfortunate several years ago.

While contemplating a career within the criminal justice system, I’d sit in on the sentencing phase of a criminal court case. A petty crook, with two prior convictions for the same crime was brought before the judge. The judge gave him 96 months in the state penitentiary for his most recent crime. He explained that since there was little jail time involved after the first two convictions, he wouldn’t forgive the third conviction and let the young man off easy.

Quick on his feet, the young man did the math and realized 96 months equaled eight years off of his life in the world. Quicker still, and before the judge could finish his explanation, the young man held up both of his hands to form a “T” as if he was signaling for a timeout from the judge. The judge continued to explain his reasoning for the lengthy sentence while ignoring the man’s stunned resistance to his fate. Using all rhyme and reason, the man begged the judge for leniency; for forgiveness. It was too late for him though; the day of reckoning had come.

Too long, as a youth growing up and even as a young Christian, I was misled by some who taught that to repent was to simply ask forgiveness for sin. I was told that no matter the quality or quantity of the sin, just telling God how sorry I was did the trick. Because God is true to His word, He will forgive. It was as simple as that.

I believe that it is not the whole truth. Our loving God is a forgiving God. But, He will not be mocked. We can’t repeatedly come to God with apologies for the same sins that we know are sins and we continue to practice them expecting leniency. He is the true Chief Justice and ultimate teacher. There will be a price to pay and we will learn our lesson; sooner or later, one way or the other.

The young man before the judge had followed a life-path that he knew was wrong. The laws of society made that clear. He was forgiven twice and given light punishment. He continued down his life-path and it led to his sudden downfall. I often wondered what would have happened if he changed his life-course after his first conviction, or even after the second conviction. No doubt he wouldn’t have had to worry about the 96 months!

The Spirit within me has forced me to recognize that repentance is more than saying “I’m sorry.” I learned through that courtroom experience, as well as through my studies of the Word, that repentance is a call to action. Repentance is an urgent plea to do one thing, right now. I am to turn away from sin and live in accordance with God’s way.

For example: If my wife cheats on me one time…shame on her. If she apologizes, I take her back, and she does it a second time…embarrassment falls on me. If she apologizes yet again, I take her back and she does it a third time…call me the fool.

Shame falls on the sinner every time simply because God can never be shamed, nor will God ever be embarrassed and, certainly, He is never the fool. God is a loving, and forgiving, God. He knows we are imperfect and extremely prone to messing up. But, we must make no mistake, He will not allow any of us to make a mockery of His Good Name or His Perfect Word through our repeated acts of transgression when we know they go against His Good Name and Perfect Word.

He invites us to: “Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is near.”

When the Kingdom comes, ninety-six months, or even eight years, will seem like a party and, as was the case with the criminal judge, timeouts will be ignored.

Kelvin James writes from Medford, Oregon.

Time & Money

By Scott Schumacher

Are we living the life God has created us to live? Are we investing our time and money in ways that have eternal significance or are we simply consuming the resources that God has created for us? Are we simply taking up space and focusing on our own needs and desires? If we are not receiving the blessings that God has prepared for us by serving, we are missing out. In addition, the people we were designed to serve are missing out too.

Are we poor stewards of our time and money? For some it may be for just a moment, for some it may be for a season and others may live their entire life misusing their gifts, abilities, passions and skills.
God has put it on my heart to be bold and share:

We are designed to serve God
We are created to serve God
We are commanded to serve God

The Bible say: “God has created us for a life of good deeds, which he has already prepared for us to do.” We were created to serve, not to be served. If I look at my lifestyle and you look at yours, we’ll find that we spend much time making life easier and more comfortable for ourselves. We spend much time and money on leisure and recreation which in most cases is very self serving. Look at the amount of time and money spent with just the television, sporting events and non-nutritional foods. I praise God for giving me His grace and empowering me with His spirit to change my focus. As I do, I receive His blessing and those around me are blessed too!

As we learn to live the life God created us for, our lives will have a deeper meaning. By living the life He designed specifically for us, a life of serving Him by serving others, we will start to feel and experience “the good life.” God designed each of us to serve and by doing so (by giving Him our all) we will experience richness in life that cannot be substituted by anything on this earth. Richness not from what we can possess on the earth, but a deep richness and fulfillment that God has prepared for us by simply serving. As we do so, our focus and desires will change. The way we use our time and spend our money will be eternally focused instead of on temporary things. We won’t have a need or even the desire to waste our time and money on relationships, activities and possessions that distract us from serving. Instead, we can live with the purpose and passion Mother Teresa had, but in our own specific way, with our own specific abilities and using our own specific experiences.

“For Christians, service is not optional, something to be tacked onto our schedules if we can spare the time. It is the heart of the Christian life. Jesus came “to serve” and “to give” –and those two verbs should define your life on earth.” (From Purpose Driven Life)

The solution may not be easy, but it is simple: We can all learn where God designed us to serve and then go do it. We can’t do it alone, but as we seek God’s plan we will discover a deeper satisfaction from our Christian experience.

Here are some suggestions to get started:

1) Let’s get more involved in our church.

2) Let’s allocate 40 days of our lives to read and apply “The Purpose Driven Life” book this coming holiday season. (If you don’t have or can’t afford the book, I’ll commit to getting one for you)

3) Let’s take some time to identify what gifts, abilities and skills we have been given to serve God with. (If you need help contact me)

Imagine what our lives and our churches will look like if we all do this? If every Christian was using his or her God given abilities, experiences, finances and gifts collectively to serve others and build God’s Kingdom…wow!

Imagine what can be done as every Christian man, woman and child tithed to his church and spent his time and money more purposefully.

Scott Schumacher writes from Redding, California.
scott.schumacher.nbz4@statefarm.com
530-604-8231

Acts Of Kindness Are Healthy

By Michele Howe

"When I was young, I admired clever people. Now that I am old, I admire kind people."
--Abraham Joshua Heschel

Proffering acts or words of kindness are healthful, there's no question about it. For starters, there's the Biblical injunction that it is more blessed to give than receive. Nor should we forget that it's simply inhumane (and soul searing) to observe another person struggling without offering some form of aid or relief. Then there's the internal physiological reward of having done a good deed that makes a person want to affect a repeat performance. This feel-good emotion has been dubbed a "helper's high" by Allan Luks author of The Healing Power of Doing Good. The sudden release of endorphins is comparable to a runner's high and is similarly characterized by experiencing an initial rush of euphoria followed by an inner calm that enhances and stabilizes emotional well-being long after the deed is done. Sounds good and it is.

According to the Random Acts of Kindness Foundation, there are multiple, additional physiological factors that occur after a person performs a kind act. It matters not whether you're male or female (this is an equal opportunity benefit), or even if you know the person you are helping (most individuals don't). However, increased frequency of volunteerism brings about higher and longer lasting health benefits. So adopting an altruistic lifestyle, which is consistently represented by the extending of oneself on behalf of another, is a no-lose venture. Men and women alike can expect to experience more emotional resilience while reducing negativity and hostility. They may likewise discover that their good deeds will be far-reaching enough to lower their incidences of headaches, backaches, depression, colds/flu, and arthritic problems. Luks believes that there is a correlation between these benefits and a person's outlook on life in general. If one believes he is making a difference, his internal framework responds toward that inclination. Luks' studies have shown that do-gooders enjoy a stronger immune system, there is a decrease in intensity/awareness of physical pain, positive emotions are "activated" while negative ones diminish, and bodily stress is relieved. Perhaps one of the strongest statements for appropriating random acts of kindness into one's every day existence is that, "the health benefits and sense of well-being return for hours or even days whenever the act is remembered." In other words, the good stuff trails in your wake and becomes the impetus for even more genuine acts of kindness.

Everyday ways to "do good."

* Keep your eyes open to the needs and dispositions of others.
* Listen to what someone is telling you, beyond the scope of what they verbalize.
* Be willing to extend yourself, even if it means setting aside your agenda.
* Offer to others, in same measure, what you yourself value most.
* Lead by example and be humble enough to realize no task is beneath you.
* Remember and reflect on those moments when someone extended kindness in your direction.
* Focus on living with an other-ness lifestyle every day.

Being do "gooders" takes on a variety of dimensions that can encompass the physical, emotional and spiritual facets that serve to define who we are. With a focus on ministry as a lifestyle, God will use our acts of service for the benefit of others while simultaneously "blessing" us as we mirror his love to the world. May we accurately represent the look of Christ's face, the touch of his hand, and tone of his voice to each person we meet.

Michele Howe writes from LaSalle, Michigan. jhowe@toast.net

Be Earnest and Repent Says the Lord

By Barry N. Shaw

The Bible never ceases to amaze me in its wondrous teachings. In Jesus’ messages to the seven churches in the Book of Revelation, He tells five of the seven churches to repent and commends the other two. Why?

Churches that are filled with people who have a personal and loving relationship with Jesus Christ and remain true to His Word are following His Way. Churches which have “lost the authority of the Word of God rather than holding to the doctrine of the total depravity of man...and who have abandoned the great doctrine of justification by faith,” have gone astray and need to repent. (J. Vernon McGee on Revelation 3:5)

By repent, the Lord means that they should change their mind and direction from following their way to following His Way; to go from sin and its disastrous consequences, to God and eternal life.

The five churches who’d gone astray were Ephesus (the loveless church) - they’d lost their personal and loving relationship with Jesus Christ; Pergamum (the compromising church) - they’d adopted heretic doctrines; Thyatira (the corrupt church) - they’d accepted a new morality, i.e. accepted Christ, but lived on a low moral plane; Sardis (the dead church) - they were spiritually dead and going through the motions of church; and worst of all, Laodicea (the lukewarm church) - they were neither hot nor cold for Jesus, i.e. they were the apostate church which professed to be Christians, but in reality were not.

In his letter to the Philippians, the Apostle Paul said: “For to you it has been granted on behalf of Christ, not only to believe in Him, but also to suffer for His sake...” Philippians 1:29 It’s our privilege to believe in Jesus Christ and to suffer just as He suffered for us on His Cross. The churches at Smyrna and Philadelphia were respectively the suffering and the faithful churches that Jesus commended.

Smyrna was a center of emperor worship. There, the first temple in honor of Tiberius was built. Emperor worship was compulsory for every citizen on threat of death. Once a year a citizen had to burn incense on the altar to the godhead of Caesar and say, “Caesar is lord.” Once said, the person would receive a certificate that presumably enabled him to do business. Most Christians in Smyrna refused to do this and were severely persecuted. McGee says concerning the suffering Christians in Smyrna: “The Lord Jesus told the church in Smyrna not to fear suffering. Believe me, that is the one thing that we in the church are frightened of today. We do not want to pay a price for serving the Lord Jesus, and yet that was His method.”

The Christians in the Church in Philadelphia were missionaries. As the easternmost of the seven churches and an outpost of upper Asia, it was effective in evangelizing the area in the face of continual threats from the Barbarians. The Philadelphians like the Smyrnaians, were persecuted for their beliefs in Christ and yet, they remained true to the Word of God, no matter what the circumstances. They guarded and kept the Word of God as it was committed to them and did not depart from their faith in Jesus Christ. Their faith was as strong as that held by the apostolic church. They manifested a loyalty to the Name of Christ Himself and made a public confession of their trust in Him. (Walvoord, Commentary on the Revelation of Jesus Christ, page 85)

The teachings of the Lord concerning His church hold true to this day. There are still churches that are loveless, willing to compromise (political correctness), corrupt, dead, and worst of all lukewarm.

But glory be to God, there are a multitude of churches that are faithful to His Word and who are willing to suffer for Him just as He suffered for us. As for Laodiceans in our midst, Revelation 3:19 says: “...be earnest and repent.” Let’s be hot for the Lord, not lukewarm. Let’s turn back to His Word and be willing to suffer for His Name. “For the Word of God is living and powerful and sharper than any two-edged sword...” Hebrews 4:12

Barry N. Shaw writes from Applegate valley, Oregon

Repentance is the Call of a Loving Father

By Troy Pomeroy

If put in the right perspective, repentance is a beautiful word and concept. In simplest terms, it is our turning away from sins and fleshly desires and turning toward God. Unfortunately, the word has gotten a bad rap. Probably because there is often judgment associated with it. People really don’t like being told that what they are doing is wrong and that they need to change. Especially if it comes from another imperfect person.

Ironically, the one person who was able to judge without being a hypocrite doesn’t judge people. Consider the words of our Lord Jesus: “I judge no man.” John 8:16 (KJV) and “I came not to judge the world but to save the world.” John 12:47 (KJV)

Sometimes Christians, in their desire to help others follow God, become their own worst enemy. Their good intentions can actually alienate people from God. That’s when repentance is misunderstood. It is not a pronouncement of guilt or judgment. It is not a warning that if your actions are not perfect, then God will cease to love you.

Rather, repentance is the call from the deepest part of the heart of the Father. It’s a call for His wayward children to return to Him. It’s been the call of His heart since the fall in the garden and will be the call of His heart until His glorious return.

It is not the voice of an angry God. Though God hates and, in his righteousness, cannot tolerate sin, he has nothing but love for His children. Instead, His message is “come.” It’s a call to bring us back to Him – not for punishment, but for an eternal relationship.

Right after Adam and Eve realized their sin and hid in the garden, God asked, “Where are you?” He called them out of hiding and ultimately into fellowship with Him. In the generations that followed, all the men of the earth became wicked. It was then that He sent preachers of righteousness, like Enoch and Noah, to plead with people to return to Him. And when the Flood came, it was God’s voice that called Noah into the ark.

It’s that same message that has persisted through the ages, as expressed in Isaiah 1:18: “"Come now, let us reason together," says the LORD. "Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool.” (NIV)

Each time the message is sent, some respond, but many do not. Far from judgment, the call to repent is an invitation. It can be seen very clearly in Jesus’ life. He says in a variety of ways, “Come, follow me.” And indicating repentance and a new way of life is not a burden, Jesus said: “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28 (NASB)

After Jesus’ Ascension, the message was carried on by His followers. Peter, Jude, James, and others became preachers of righteousness, working until the end of their earthly lives to bring people to Jesus. In one of those defining moments, at Pentecost, 3000 men responded to Peter’s Spirit-filled sermon. Finally realizing who Jesus was and their desperate need for a savior, they asked what they must do. Peter’s response: Repent, and be baptized.”

What is really amazing is how tireless God is in sending His plea and invitation to come back to Him. Even during the Great Tribulation, He will send 144,000 witnesses to proclaim His power and goodness to the ends of the earth. All the way through the Bible, even until the last verses of Revelation, the message remains “come.”

The Spirit and the bride say, "Come!" And let him who hears say, "Come!" Whoever is thirsty, let him come; and whoever wishes, let him take the free gift of the water of life. Revelation 22:17 (NIV)

Repentance, then, is not a shameful thing. If God were angry with us, he would want us to be far away from Him, to be done with us. No one would invite someone they disliked to their wedding feast; certainly not to be their bride. The call to repent is a call to draw near and return. That call can only come from a heart of love.

Troy Pomeroy writes from Eagle Point, Oregon. pastortroy@epacenter.com

Repentance

By David Snyder

As a teaching pastor for many years I always enjoyed presenting truths from God’s Word that stimulated thought and created deep interest. Teaching was more than sharing knowledge. It was bringing listeners to a place they needed to be to be able to listen carefully to grasp what truth was being shared. In other words, truth and error are often separated by a thin line.

So read carefully what is being presented in this article. Evaluate it. Check it out. As the Bible says: “Prove that which is good.” What is written here may not be new to some. To some it may be.

I have said many times: Christians need to understand that God is not as interested in our asking for forgiveness as we might think. How many times have we asked God to forgive us for the same old sins over and over again? The truth is, asking for forgiveness is rather easy. All we need to do is speak the words and we think everything is OK. Believe it or not, it isn’t!

Think about this: To tell God we are sorry or ask to be forgiven doesn’t really say much to God. We can be sorry for sin because it leaves us hurt or damages someone else. I can tell you that I am sorry I hurt you, but it promises no guarantee that I won’t do it again.

Asking for forgiveness is rather easy. We can speak the words to God, but there may not be the deep sense of remorse that we ought to feel. This is why an important word is placed in scripture. The word is repentance. We can be sorry for our sins against God and other people, but if there is no repentance, our asking for forgiveness and expressing sorrow has no depth of meaning.

The word repentance in scripture means “a turning around,” a complete alteration of the basic motivation and direction of one’s life. Examples are found in Luke 18:13 and in 2 Corinthians 7: 8-10. Baptism is an outward expression of true repentance; a turning from the old life to the new life found in Christ. That’s why it is so important.

The call for repentance all through the Old Testament was a call for the people to come back from where they had fallen away from God’s will. The same is true today. The Holy Spirit is constantly calling us back to where we need to be in our Christian walk.

I don’t know about you, but there are so many things that can drag me away from what I ought to be and what God called me to be. Being sorry and asking forgiveness is important for me, but I must never leave out the need for repentance.

We need to turn. We need to recognize the changes that need to be made in our lives and we need to ask God to empower us to make those changes. Repentance…this is what our Lord is waiting to hear from His people.

Dave Snyder writes from Milwuakie, Oregon.

Walker Study Center Reopens

By Deborah Levendusky

Organizations devoted to drug and alcohol rehabilitation are undergoing profound changes with the advent of managed care and socio-economic restrictions. Contradictory and often competing forces, such as cost containment, market-driven service provision, and a “quick-fix” mentality, demand the development and implementation of a new standard.

Walker Study Center in Shady Cove, Oregon is that new standard. With a firm belief in “restoration” over rehabilitation, Walker Study Center focuses on building strong foundations in Christ for the future of the men residing in the center’s 10-month program.

Through a broad range of opportunities and a faith-based, long term Christian residential program, Walker Study Center addresses the individual needs of young men age 18 and over, and their families. The center’s directors believe that a changed life, for life, is only possible through a changed heart for Christ, finding their worth in Christ, and building strong foundations on Christ.

During their 10-month stay at Walker Study Center, these men will have the opportunity for Discipleship programs and Biblical training; Individual, group and family counseling; educational instruction; vocational training and experience; computer skills training, and much more. “By giving these men the tools that they need to succeed in life outside these doors, we are giving them a hope for the future.” says the center’s Executive Directors, David and Deborah Levendusky, “With the limited availability of successful rehabilitation programs, it is crucial for Walker Study Center to maintain, and make available, an all-encompassing program that builds confidence, worth and strong foundations in the lives of our clients.”

Named in honor of Dr. & Mrs. Paul Walker for their care and compassion for troubled and hurting people, the Walker Study Center was first established in 1992 by the Walker's daughter and son-in-law, Ron and Charlotte Boehm.

With the re-opening of the center, their continued vision to see many saved out of a life of addiction and into a saving relationship with Jesus Christ is still carried on today and woven throughout every aspect of the care and teaching given at the center.

Drug prevention is also of the utmost importance to Walker Study Center. By getting involved with the community through schools, after school programs, and churches; the center hopes to help to keep the public better informed.

Walker Study Center will be opening it’s doors to 22 young men age 18 and over, in the Winter of 2006/2007, with a future ambition of building additional dorms as well as an amphitheater and a chapel. “Additionally, we would someday like to meet the needs of women and their children.” says David and Deborah, “but for now, we are concentrating on restoring lives, one heart at a time

Debi Levendusky writes from Shady Cove, Oregon.

Blessings — A Two-Way Street

By Lynn Ludwick

As Thanksgiving approaches, “blessings” are on my mind. The blessings I receive—I cherish them, but shouldn’t it be a two-way street? Am I source of blessing to others?

I pondered that thought at breakfast recently. In the early morning quiet, with my hands wrapped around a steaming cup of coffee, I sat at the kitchen table and watched the Rogue River bounce by on its endless course to the ocean. The muffin on my plate was from the freezer, made with peaches Alan and I had purchased at a Washington fruit stand in August. We stored the boxes of fruit in the basement, and from them I learned some lessons about the effect people have on each other.

On the positive side, we enjoyed fresh peaches eaten over the sink with juice dripping down our chins, as well as in muffins and in a hot crisp topped with ice cream. We enjoyed each delicious bite of the peaches—they both nourished and pleased us. And when I made a crisp for our neighbors, a thank you for feeding our cat while we were gone, their smiles assured me they felt special and honored.

On the other hand, rot spreads. If a rotten peach lay by itself, I tossed just that one. However, if it touched a good peach, before long fuzzy mold literally glued the two together. The one corrupted the other and they both ended up in the compost pile.

Other peaches looked great on the outside, but were rotten at the core. Ever dealt with people like that? They appear kind and helpful to outward appearances, but as you become better acquainted, you uncover poison on the inside. Oh my—do I have any rot buried deep? A contemplation, something I’d best go over with God. “Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” Psalm 139:23-24

I want to be like the good peaches. If I’m blessed, I’ll bless others. And I am indeed blessed. “Blessed be the Lord, who daily loads us with benefits…” Psalm 68:19 I can sing the Doxology with heartfelt gratitude. “Praise God from whom all blessings flow…” However, God doesn’t intend that I become a stagnant pool. Jesus is Living Water, and wants me to be a stream through which His bounty flows, some for me, some for others.

But back to peaches. I don’t want to grow a rotten core or sport a moldy exterior, corrupting those around me. The only way I can keep out of the compost pile myself is if I remain attached to the branch and undergo its nourishment and the pruning of the Master Gardener. And if I’m ever to be counted a blessing to others, I’d best cling tightly. Further, God promises the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. (Galatians 5:22-23). We’re talking thoughts, motivations, words, actions—service to others, even sacrificially so (though holding my new granddaughter doesn’t count).

In Acts 1:8 Jesus suggested a pattern for spreading that fruit: “…and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.” I’d best start with the person across from me at the kitchen table, then my neighbors—literally, and those in my community, my state, my nation, and around the world.

In a few weeks I’ll gather with my family to enjoy my favorite meal and count my blessings, one by one and by the dozen. And as the pumpkin pie settles, I’ll consider how I may be a blessing to my family and others in the coming days.

“…whatever a man sows, that he will also reap… And let us not grow weary in doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all…” Galatians 6:7, 9-10

“So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you…” Matthew 7:12

Lynn Ludwick writes from Shady Cove, Oregon. Lynniegirl45@hotmail.com

Faith Based Films are a Hit

THE PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN

People are no longer just congregating in buildings with steeples to Praise God; but rather are kicking back in a cinema seat, with popcorn and coke to praise their God. Hitting the big screen, faith-based films are also hitting the hearts of the often overlooked voice of moviegoers.

FACING THE GIANTS is picking up where The Passion of the Christ left off. Marketers and filmmakers are asking why the “little film that could”—a $100,000 budget and all-volunteer cast—is a hit Middle America. Filmmakers believe the answer lies in their intentions, the film’s backup in church wide (now nationwide) prayer, and the considerable costs averted from donated sets and catering, and volunteer crews.

This little church made movie now defies the Hollywood rule of spending million to get results. FACING THE GIANTS is no doubt paving a new way for movie making.

For years moviemakers have tried unlocking the code into the Christian market. More often than not, they would dish out big bucks only to end in red line failure. Responses from FACING THE GIANTS suggest this audience wants simply a movie that will shed a normal and true light on Christians. That alone is the code.

FACING THE GIANTS is the football-and-faith movie made by a church in Albany GA and picked by Sony for national distribution. The all-volunteer cast was composed of church members, and any profits to the church will help fund an Albany sports complex. Since opening September 29 on 441 screens, the movie has been covered by the Washington Post, ABC News, The Today Show, Fox News Network, CNN, and much more.

Several weeks out from its Hollywood debut, FACING THE GIANTS is having the ‘Napoleon Dynamite affect’ of sparking more and more curiosity through word of mouth rather than mega scale promotion. FACING THE GIANTS continues to deliver impressive numbers in box office

dollars earned and per-screen intake. Equally impressive is “market pull” of the “Booster Clubs,” a movie-placement model that evolved in response to community demand.

Some 55 communities across the U.S. already pre-purchased 750-plus tickets, the “Booster Club” minimum, to bring FACING THE GIANTS to their towns. And each theater represents a minimum $7,000 in box office receipts.

As FACING THE GIANTS leads the burgeoning trend in post-Passion filmmaking, it is proving that hit films aren’t limited to Hollywood or big budgets.

For theater listings near you, or to read further information visit www.facingthegiants.com.

Thankfully Wedded

By Patti Iverson

Shakespeare’s Portia replied in “The Merchant of Venice,” “One of me is yours, the other is half yours, mine own, I would say, but if mine, then yours, and so ALL yours!” She was responding to several suitors. Poor lady. She feared losing herself in being a couple. She envisioned Velcro on both hips thinking she’d be conjoined forever. I’d be scared, too! Okay, so there was no Velcro in that era…

The best “coupledom” comes in stages. My husband and I are a great example. Yes, I would put Randy and I up as a model to follow. We have done it God’s way, with our own twists ‘n turns. Perfect, no? Terrific? Yes, for 38 years.

Back when we were young, innocent, and downright cute we entered the first stage:

#1 Friendship
How fun being pals, getting to know one another, meet families; being with friends. Ahhh, the splash of excitement to titillate our senses. First though, Randy had to make up his mind whom to focus his attentions on: my twin sister, or me. I won! Soon mutual attraction became stronger and turned into the second stage.

# 2 Dating
“There will never be an end to the war between the sexes. There’s too much fraternizing with the enemy!”George Orwell

When the relationship changes, couples need to be together often to learn, impress, joust, flirt, and enjoy each other. It’s exciting when two people focus on each other exclusively. When dating you share more deeply than you ever did as friends. Randy and I learned “some” of our differences plus common bonds. He’s a morning lark; me = night owl. He likes adventure, me = homebody. He eats to live. I live to eat. But it’s still mostly “surface” knowledge of each other until the third stage.

#3 Bonding
In 12th century Middle England bond meant bands, as in the tie that binds (or gags). It meant restraining something together. This is when you “get the feeling that you feel when you feel you’re going to feel a feeling that you’ve never felt before!” Got that? The friendship has turned to love and often to lusting here—oh what a feeling! You really are a couple, but still individuals with separate lives. Randy and I went everywhere together including church, and knew in our hearts we could count on one another. Finally came the fourth stage.

#4 UNITED
For me it was time for Randy to either fish or cut bait! I was tired of those other three levels in four years and longed for real commitment. Many times men are still at the third level and not quite ready for the fourth. I wanted to get united in marriage. I wanted, needed, cried for that shiny ring upon my finger telling the world that I was spoken for, a betrothed woman! This is a time to realize that love isn’t finding a perfect person; it’s seeing an imperfect person perfectly. Boy howdy, we are so imperfect, we are perfectly suited!

Lad asked man, “What’s the secret to your happy marriage? “We go out for a romantic dinner once a week.” “That’s great! Where do you go?” “I like Italian. I don’t know where she goes…”

This is not the kind of relationship we want as a couple! Mr. Orwell said “Men can only be happy when they do not assume that the object of life is happiness.” Randy and I have found the best love is Agape love: seeking the highest good for the other person. That is what brings us the greatest happiness. Not “My way or the highway.” Not “My needs must be met.” Love is a verb, not a noun. It’s not love, but the caring of that love, as a priority in our lives, that matters.

Sure, issues come up throughout many years. Being ignored. Selfishness. Paranoias or insecurities. Miss or non-communication, or even the biggies like money, sex, children, midlife, illnesses, out-laws, ‘n in-laws. Sometimes the only reasons married folks switch from spouse to spice are just to have somebody new to blame. The real joy in being a couple is when you muddle through all the stuff of life together. Sometimes battered, bruised and worse for wear, but the old cliché about “whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” is true. If you were to keep a ledger and tote up all the joys on one side and trials on the other a united, loving couple would discover that the joys outweigh sorrows by a long shot. How good can it get? Reeeeallllly good! Especially when blessed by the Blesser Himself, who created couples in the first place. M-m-mmm! We’re so thankful. I hope beautiful Portia ended up giving it a try.

Patti Iverson writes from Medford, Oregon. randpi@charter.net

I’m Sorry … I Got Caught!

From Chad, the Editor in Chief

There isn’t much true repentance these days.
Maybe there never has been.

A quick look into Bible history reveals a people that said they were committed to God with their mouths, but their hearts were far from Him. When God held them accountable for their sins, they were only sorry that they got caught. Sorry and repentance are not the same thing. It takes heart to have repentance.

David was cut to the heart when he was confronted with his sin with Bathsheba. When his eyes were finally opened to what he had done he cried out to God deeply sorrowful for his actions and how they affected God. “Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according to your great compassion blot out my transgressions. Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin. For I know my transgressions, and my sin is always before me. Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight.” Psalm 51:1-4

True repentance is a broken heart and a desire to turn away from one’s sins. David continues in his heart message to God. “Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones you have crushed rejoice. Hide your face from my sins and blot out all my iniquity. Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.” Psalm 51:7-12

I wonder how often we have been cut to the heart with sorrow over our sins. Maybe we can’t see our sins. Maybe we don’t want to see our sins. Maybe we are afraid that if we see our sins we won’t be able to take the pain. Maybe we are afraid we can’t change. Maybe we are afraid we won’t or can’t be loved if people knew our sins.
Jesus said that He came to heal the “brokenhearted.” He came to set the captive free. He came to open the eyes of the blind. (See Isaiah 61 and Luke 4)

God longs for our repentance. He longs to restore us and heal us. Many years ago He said to His people: “If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land.” 2 Chronicles 7:14

Notice the “if” is on our part…not God’s!

If we will repent we can find healing. If we will ask for forgiveness we can be forgiven. If we will turn from our sinful ways we can find a new life. If…if…if.

It all takes a heart, not afraid to be broken, not afraid to be honest, not afraid to face God, not afraid to feel sorrow for its actions. This is far more than being sorry because we got caught!

John sums it up well: “If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in our lives.” 1 John 1:8-10

I change the “we” in the verse to “I” and realize that it’s my choice to let God do His life-changing work on my heart. It’s your choice.

The world needs to see true repentance from us if we ever hope to influence it for God’s kingdom.